Overcoming Comparison: Honor The Season You’re In

Hello friends, welcome, welcome, welcome. 

This is Gigi, and today I’m sharing the topic “In Honor of Your Season.” 

I think this is a great reflection topic because sometimes when we’re moving through life so quickly, we don’t think of this. We’re just going, going, going. 

The thing that happens is we humans have this little tendency to compare, which can either drive us to better ourselves or, often, it paralyzes us to the point where we don’t do anything. 

You’ll have to really see for yourself what that means. I’m sure you have both experiences—sometimes it drives you to go for something, and sometimes you get paralyzed by it.

So, I want to share a perspective that I think about when I get into these situations because I know, for one thing, it often depends on my mindset or what’s happening in my life at the moment. 

After working with so many women over my 38 years of my career, I come across this almost daily. 

Frankly, I deal with it in my own life too, with my own insecurities. I encounter it more frequently than I’d like to admit, to tell you the truth. 

But let’s be transparent here because we’re all learning together as we go through this journey. And if we’re not where we want to be in our lives, sometimes it’s really tough to cheer other people on. 

Have you ever had that feeling and wondered, “What’s wrong with me?” It’s not because we’re bad people; it’s part of the human default system. When we’re down, it’s really hard to be with people who are so up sometimes. So, what do we do about that? How do we handle that? 

We need ways to understand and embrace these times because, here’s the thing I always remind myself: “This too shall pass,” right?

We get this amazing opportunity every day to go to sleep at night and then wake up with a completely new perspective in the morning. To see the perspective you wish to have the next morning, take some moments of reflection. 

If you’re really feeling down on yourself or constantly comparing yourself to others, it’s good to stop and take notice. Ask yourself, “Okay, I’m feeling all this, but what can I do during these times that will actually help me walk through this?” 

One thing is to decide that tomorrow morning when you wake up, you’re going to practice gratitude. Right when your mind clicks on in the morning and starts telling you all the ways that you’re bad, or the world is bad, or whatever—what can you wake up to?

You hear this all the time—gratitude is talked about everywhere—but really, really go in and say, “Hey, just three things. These are the things that are so good in my life.” 

My health, for one—wow, I get to be healthy. I get to move in the world the way I want to, which is amazing, right? That my family is healthy, and I have these beautiful grandchildren, and they’re thriving. 

So you consciously choose how you’re going to create a positive mindset in the morning when you’re dealing with a time or season that may be more difficult. 

Another one for me, something I came to when I walked the Camino Santiago last year, was through all my walking. I decided to walk it alone because I really wanted to be with myself. I hadn’t had much time in my life to really reflect over the last few years, so I said, “This is a huge opportunity for me.” I only made it 230 miles, but that was still awesome, right? Out of the 500, I’m going to go back and do it again next year. 

But in that time, the thing I came to was: “Count your blessings. Count your blessings. Look at the glass as half full instead of half empty because I have so many blessings.” When the little whiny part of me comes up, all it needs is a little self-care. That’s what I want to talk about too. 

Often when we’re feeling like this or going through a challenging time, maybe it’s because someone in your family is having a health crisis, and you’re the person who has to be there, the caregiver. 

I know when my father was sick, I had to be there, be with him, and be on top of things. It started to feel hard, so it’s so important during that time to take care of ourselves first. 

I’m talking about getting a little selfish, cuddling yourself, even loving and embracing yourself, and cheering yourself on, even when you’re the victim or the villain.

How can you love yourself? How can you take those moments? The same thing applies—perspective in the morning. 

Sometimes when I’m going through something difficult, I will hug myself and say, “Gigi, it’s all right. Hey, I know this is a tough time. It’s okay. You’ve got this, girl. You’ve got this.” I talk to myself and have compassion for myself first because if you can’t have compassion for yourself, it’s going to be more difficult to have it for others. 

Your journey, the challenges, and the season you’re in, give you character. Really, when you look at it, it gives you a story to tell, whether it’s a good story, a bad story, or a really ugly story.

So, you want to fully immerse yourself in the journey. When you have this awareness and consciousness that you are going through a time and this is a season in your life, then you can play around with this. You can still have the feelings; it can still feel difficult and challenging. But within that, you can also shift your mindset and perspective. 

It doesn’t mean your feelings are going to change immediately.

But the kinder you are to yourself, here’s what happens: the quicker your judgments of others will melt away. One day, you’ll find yourself feeling super happy for someone instead of comparing yourself to them. 

When somebody shares their good news, you’ll think, “My gosh, that’s such great news. I’m so happy for you.” You’ll feel really filled up and grateful for all those thousands of little blessings that surround you each day. 

But remember, life is up and down. It’s a roller coaster. When it goes down, it’s going to go back up. That’s why I say to honor that season, even the down season.

So in our forgetting process, we talk about if you are at 60% on a scale of 1 to 100 in terms of feeling full and really getting what you want in life, the other 40% is making sure nobody else gets what they want. 

You might think, “I don’t do that, right? I absolutely want people to get what they want.” And, of course, you do. Of course you do. 

But when we’re not getting what we want, we can’t fully embrace somebody else’s happiness, especially if it’s something we want. If they have something we want, right? 

The way I can show you this is to imagine your neighbor—you walk outside, and they’re driving off in their brand-new blue Ferrari. You say to your partner, “You know, their relationship’s not that good, though.” 

We have to put them down a little bit, even though they just got something amazing, and maybe deep down, we want a blue Ferrari, right? 

So, part of us can’t fully allow for that celebration. We can’t celebrate with them. But the higher you go up on the scale, the more you have no problem allowing people to get what they want, and you feel really good about it. 

That’s why it’s so important to see what you want in life, really choose what you want in life, and go after it. The more you get what you want, the more you can be supportive of what other people want.

So I want to share a little story. One of my clients shared a story with me this week that deeply touched me. She’s going through a challenging time in her life right now—kind of one of those dark nights of the soul—and she’s trying to find grace when she can. She went to lunch with a younger woman she’s become friends with this year. This woman is very strong right now. She has her life together. She started her new business, and she’s on fire. She’s just going after it.

My client started to compare herself because she’s older, and then she felt small and kind of embarrassed. But she caught herself and thought, “I’m really going to be transparent about this because otherwise a little piece of me will feel envious, even though she’s doing so well.” 

So she said, “You know, I have to tell you this. I was feeling a little apprehensive because I knew we were going to have lunch and talk about business, and I’m in such a different place right now. I felt like I really had nothing to share except the challenges I’m facing.” 

But then she realized, “I’m in a different season of life, and that’s okay. I don’t need to compare myself.”

We had talked about these different seasons in life, these different times. Some seasons come through our age, through where we are in life. Some come through challenges. Some come through outside situations that create things in our life. Some seasons come through choices we’ve made, and maybe sometimes we’ve taken a wrong step, right?

She was so surprised because the younger woman was so grateful for her honesty. She told her that one of the best things that had happened to her was meeting her this year and developing a deep friendship. 

My client felt so appreciative when the younger woman said she really valued and loved meeting with her. Everything relaxed, and they had a really beautiful, heartfelt lunch together. 

You can see in that moment of vulnerability, in that moment of really sharing, this is the season she’s in right now, and it’s okay. It may not feel okay, but it really is okay. 

So honor your season, whatever it is.

When you honor and embrace it, you have grace. You allow yourself the time to work through it. You allow yourself the time to get through it, or you allow yourself the time to embrace the age, the time, the business, what’s happening in your family, or what’s going on in your relationship. 

Don’t resist because resisting will make your journey harder than it needs to be. 

When you’re going through a difficult time or a season, maybe it’s a season of age, consciously think through and choose what you want in this season of your life. 

If you’re having difficulties in your business, decide what you want for your business after this is through. Where are you going? It’s not just about what you want or what you’re dreaming of—what are you going to choose? 

You’re going to choose a great business that is supportive and really feeds your soul. You’ll make the choices as you go through these challenges to create that. 

That’s so, so important—seeing what you want to choose in your life.

So, my blessing for you today: this is going to be a short podcast, and I hope it touches you enough to where you think of this—honor your season when something comes up, and maybe you’re resisting what life is putting in front of you. 

Spend some time being grateful for yourself today. 

Close your eyes and think of you—all the beautiful ways you’ve touched another’s life. 

You’ve given birth to your children if you have children. 

You’ve loved a man or a woman or whoever. 

You’ve made your partner stronger through your love, through how you contribute in your work, through your generosity, or even how you care for people. 

You’re there to listen when a friend needs a place to share their fears. 

If you’re an entrepreneur and you’re leading a team, and that team is made up of other people who have families, again—honor yourself and really be grateful for what you do in this world.

If you’re feeling down on yourself, know that this, too shall change. As I said, this will pass. 

You can feel bad for 20 minutes and then say, “Okay, I’m done with this.” Right? 

The truth is, you’ll never fully know the impact of how much you have contributed to this world. Do you understand that? But when you have glimpses, acknowledge them and give yourself a big hug, filled with love and acceptance. 

Those moments will go so far if you start to honor that in yourself.

We never know, as we move through the world every day, all the things we do. Me doing this podcast and talking with you—who knows who this may touch and really, really touch deeply if they’re going through a hard time. That has a ripple effect. 

I know for you, the listener, that you do things every single day—those moments with your children, those moments with your partner, those moments with a stranger. 

So honor the season you’re in and love yourself completely. 

All right, thanks for tuning in. 

This is a short one today, but I hope you can apply it.

We so appreciate you listening to us. See you next time.